It's that time of year again, ladies and gentlemen. I know you affectionately call the bi-annual drug compliance test the 'whiz quiz', but boss-lady Jones has informed me that heads will be posted on spears if any of you fail. Part of securing our funding depends on maintaining operative readiness, so please be ready to pass this coming Friday morning. Thanks to someone failing over at 6 with their testing, additional testing procedures will be administrated. In addition to the UA, there will be a cheek swab, so morning pastries will not be going out until the afternoon.
Please respond with your acknowledgement of receipt.
Rainy Mitchell, senior secretary